Scary thoughts, which are also quite nice

YES I have been thinking again. I never stop, so you better get used to it =w= [If you haven’t already]


Some of my friends said a few times that I should consider doing modelling work. And I did, I consider it quite often actually. Truth be told, doing modelling work would be a secret dream come true. I recently had a photoshoot with a friend of mine, and I have another fotoshoot with an other friend in about 1,5 month. I like doing photoshoots. Not only before but also behind the camera. It gives me a certain kind of joy. A few days ago, when walking home from the station, I started daydreaming. ‘What if I did some modelling jobs here and there once in a while’. And then I got scared. I-almost-crapped-my-pants kind of scared. And I began to think why. I mean, I love to try new things. Why does this particular one scare me so much? Is it the competition? I’m obviously not the only one with this dream. No, I’m scared of pressure. It may sound silly, but yeah.
However, a cute webshop I’ve been following for a while on twitter and facebook was looking for campaign models so I just send an e-mail to sign up. Will hear if I made it around 31st of May. Soyeah, cross your limbs for me?
I signed up on a whim, but baby steps are also steps.


My financial situation at the moment is crap. BUT, I decided that if by October this year, it’ll be better, I’m going on a trip. Abroad. Probably alone. WHICH IS SCARY AS FUCK Seeing I have never gone abroad on my own. Ever. JesusFuckingChrist I’m 20 years old already, so it’s about time isn’t it? Where I will be going?
The UK.
I´m planning on using my entire autumn holiday [mo-fri] to travel through the UK and -finally- visit some UK friends : ) If I have enough money by then to make it happen, it’s going to be SCARY AS FUCK. Especially if I’m going alone. JesusFuckingChrist I’m already shitting my pants just thinking about it. But also very excited. Yay new experiences! Expanding my boundaries /owo/
TBH, I’m not actually counting on it happening. But I can dream.

Erhm yeah that’s about it for this time!  x’]